youth camp

MMP had a youth camp last week and I was asked to be a nurse/small group leader. I cannot express how grateful I am to have been a part of it. There were moments during the camp that I just stopped and thanked God for allowing me to be a part of the weekend. The first morning as the youth arrived in groups, I was helping out with registration. While waiting for the next group to arrive, I was consumed with thoughts of myself, thinking about a conflict I had had. I was reading Psalm 37 that says "trust the Lord and do good" and as I read this I realized I was doing neither. I said a quick prayer asking God to help me forget about myself and for Him to show me what to do. I lifted my head, glanced to my right, and there was a young woman sitting on the steps next to me by herself. The Lord told me to go and talk to her. There is always a moment after God tells me to do something that it becomes my choice whether to follow Him or not, and all the reasons why I should not follow Him rush through my mind. It happened here to, but I was desperate to escape myself, so I got up and sat next to her. Within twenty minutes she gave her life to Christ. There is no doubt in my mind that she would have decided to follow Jesus at some point in the weekend, but I got to tell her that Jesus loved her! I got to participate in the kingdom building, to experience the goodness of God as I shared the gospel with her, to see her make a decision to follow Him. And I felt loved by Him. There is nothing that makes me feel more alive than sharing Christ with someone and watching Him change their heart right in front of me. How kind is God to allow me, such a sinner, to participate in building His kingdom. The next day, 48 youth committed their lives to Jesus by being baptized, and she was one of them. It was the first time I had ever helped in baptizing anyone, and to be able to see her commit her life to Christ in this way was so precious. Why in all of God's wisdom does He allow me to be a part of His plans? I'm so messed up, so broken, but He still uses me. I pray I will always lose sight of myself in the midst of loving others.